so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
