My brain says no but my pants say off.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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