walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
