dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
