Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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