Having a random hookup so left but love u
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
