at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She's the barista slut.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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