sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
well most of my day revolves around power hour
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
