I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
