literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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