why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
