You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize