No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
