K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You are a genius and a whore.
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