are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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