If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
