he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
i've created a new STD.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize