The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize