shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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