i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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