I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize