Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
did i just pee glitter
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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