bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
