I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
