if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
