he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I am one with the molecules
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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