So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
