I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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