brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
the day after is always just damage control
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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