Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
