Pappa wants mamma naked
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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