hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
