i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
do nipples grow back?
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