you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I am one with the molecules
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
