oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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