Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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