Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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