also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
