I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
