A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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