She announced her abortion via fbk
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize