Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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