I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
