i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
