Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Do you remember whose house we're in?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
