Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
