Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
