I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
