well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
