So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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