"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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